Lost

Sometimes being an adult sucks.

Big time.

Especially when on the outside it appears like you got your crap together, but on the inside you're floundering, wishing this life that you seem to find yourself in wasn't yours.

Now, I don't want you guys to worry too much about me.

For the most part, I'm okay. And, it's only sometimes when I start to really think about it and dwell on it that I start feeling like I'm lost in a foreign place that I had never planned to be.

Occasionally this is fun, at least at first, until you no longer find being lost an adventure and start longing to find your way back to somewhere, someone familiar. If you've been lost before, I'm sure you know this feeling and can almost pinpoint the moment that you start to think:

"What if I can never find my way again?"

For me, if I get lost, the thought doesn't creep in till later. At first I'm all confident in my lostness: Clearly I missed that turn a few miles back. Yes, that's what it is. But then I think to myself, what if that wasn't the turn? Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself, and it's actually just a little further. Yes, that's it. I'm freaking out for nothing.

So I press on down the same path until I realize that I am so obviously lost it's not even funny. So I make a U-turn and turn where I think I was supposed to, only it doesn't feel right still, and panic starts to set in. And slowly that thought seeps into my mind:

What if I can't get back? What if there's no one that can help me? 

What if I'll be alone and lost... forever?

I try to push this thought out of my head. I'm being irrational; it's just fear talking. I'll get out of this and be fine. I'm not alone; I won't be lost forever. But the thought still lingers... in the back of my mind, waiting to worm it's way back into the surface of my thoughts.

Eventually, after a few stops, several U-turns, and a few desperate phone calls (or GPS look ups, if I'm lucky), I do find myself at my intended destination, ready to regale my friends of my misadventure, playing off any slight panic attacks, and never revealing the one thought that I had pushed back down below.

But it's still there. Waiting. Waiting to burrow it's way back up, waiting until it's just visible enough to have someone, anyone, notice. And sometimes, it's not even me that notices first.



Yesterday, I went to a nearby restaurant by myself and ordered dinner to go. It wasn't very crowded: A family nearby the entrance that was finishing their meal, and a few friends in the back. I sat near the entrance at a stool waiting for my order, noticing the family and the surroundings. As I watched the family gather up their things and start to leave, my mind started to wander.

Even now I honestly don't remember what I was thinking about, if I even thought anything at all. I was just staring off into space. But in the periphery I notice someone trying to get my attention. In my daze, it takes a while to realize that it's the cashier telling me that part of my order is ready. I apologize for not hearing him the first time, and instead of saying it's okay or ignoring it, he asks:

"Are you okay?"

"Oh I'm fine. I was just spacing out." I reply, waving it off like it's no big deal. He kind of gives me a quizzical look, like he doesn't really believe me.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asks again with real concern in his voice.

Again I tell him I'm fine that I was just thinking about all the things I had to do when I got home and that I really was okay. He hesitantly handed over my order and told me he understood because he was getting ready to go to college and he hadn't packed anything. I laughed with him and told him I knew how that was. When the other part of my order was ready and I started heading out the door, he called after me:

"I hope you have a good evening!"

"Thanks! Good luck with college!" I called back as the door closed behind me. Any other time/day I would have thought nothing more about the conversation, or I would have thought it was a bit odd and then moved on. But as I made my way back home, I couldn't stop thinking about what he had asked me and the genuine concern in his voice when he did.

Did he see something while I was spacing out? Something that I didn't notice?

Am I okay?

Am I sure?

1 Class Down, 2 more to go

I finished all the work for my creative performance today and now I can sit back and relax.

Well not really. I got a ton of stuff for my other two classes (thesis and screenwriting), but at least I don't have to worry about this other class. And because I know you guys TOTALLY want to hear my final project, here it is:

It's an audio play about a tour guide at a metal kazoo factory (It's 17 minutes FYI... hey... it's a play okay?!):

And because I know you guys ALSO want to hear about the crazy-ness that happened after I presented it to the class and to hear about a RIDICULOUS person in my class who also presented her project... (really it's a good story), you should click on the link below for my Tumblr post about it cause it comes complete with hilarious GIFS that adequately express my emotions (also you should read the tags at the bottom because they also add to the story and give you a better picture why I think this person is ridiculous):

CLICK HERE

Okie doke... that is all for now.

Just like 3 more weeks and I'm DONE. THREE MORE WEEKS.

This Cool Thing I Made

First off, I know, it's been awhile. I have seriously been so stressed that I have not wanted to do anything, not homework, not blogging, not hanging out with people. All I've wanted to do is either sleep or watch Doctor Who (which is another post in and of itself). I think I'm starting to come out of this stress-induced coma-like state, and figured I'd let y'all know that I'm still alive and not actually in a coma.

One of the projects that I finally got around to finishing was a soundscape that I had to do. Because I know y'all totally want to hear it, I figured I'd share it.
  Soundscape for EMAC by missnesbit
All of the sounds in the clip were ones I recorded except for the jungle sounds.

Now because I had to enlist the help of a few coworkers to get the office sounds, I shared the finished piece with them, and one of them was so inspired (or incredibly bored, but we'll say inspired) wrote a little story to go with the piece. I loved it so much I asked her if I could share it with you guys, and she said of course! So here it is by Lynn C.:

John strolled into his building at just a few minutes past his usual time, but he still wasn't hurrying. His shoes made a regular sound on the polished tile of the building's lobby that sounded businesslike to him, and he wasn't going to mess the rhythm up by rushing when he didn't have to.

Two other people were already waiting for the elevator when he got there, and it still took a while for one to announce its arrival with the usual chiming ding, pneumatic doors whispering open in dispassionate invitation to enter the blank little box they guarded. John got in, noticed which buttons had been pushed, and moved to the back of the elevator. His floor was going to be last, as usual. There was another floor above his, but he'd never seen anyone go up there in all the time that he'd worked in the building. They heard sounds from the upper floor - his floor's ceiling - sometimes, but never saw any people to go with them.

First stop was the third floor, announced by the elevator's female computer voice that always sounded vaguely Star Trekish to John, and the doors slid open to allow in an odor of burned coffee and copy toner. The woman who got off there walked into the maze of cubicles without a backward glance,apparently unaffected by the solid wall of busy business noise that made the two men in the elevator wince. Whatever was going on in that office, there was apparently a lot of it.

The burnt coffee odor lingered once the doors had closed again, but it fled when the computer announced their arrival at the fifth floor and the doors slid back to reveal verdant jungle. The air that poured into the little metal box felt almost liquid, humid and warm and green. A parrot flew by, complaining loudly, and the other man in the elevator rolled his eyes. "I hate that thing," he commented, sliding off his suit jacket and folding it over his arm and then taking a machete out of his nice leather briefcase before stepping out into the wild tangle of green. He immediately began hacking his way further in. "Janet!" he called out, echoed by another ugly squawk from the parrot. "Has my ten o'clock called yet? Because I think the Harris case is going to run long..."

The doors slid shut, and John adjusted his tie, grimacing at the sticky feeling the law office's jungle humidity had left under his collar. Thank goodness his office wasn't like that. Although he did kind of like the parrot; he kept hoping it would fly into the elevator some morning, but it never had.

“Fifteenth floor,” announced the elevator some thirty seconds later. The doors slid open...to a violent downpour. John jumped back with a curse. He considered the rain for a moment, then decisively pushed the close button followed by the one for the first floor; his cuff was damp and the sleeve of his jacket spotted when he pulled his hand back. The doors took their time closing, letting even more rain get in, and then the elevator was heading back down to the ground level. John brushed stray droplets off his pants, grimacing at the spots and streaks they left on the light gray fabric. He'd just go get his umbrella from the car and then go in, his boss wasn't going to yell at him for being late with the weather like that.

Crafts, Books, and My Imagination Running Away With Me

Recently, I've been on this crafting kick and I've been reading/following on Tumblr a lot of crafty blogs and crafty-type people for inspiration. I don't know why I do this to myself because we all know how I am about finishing projects that I start. But, anyway, I came across this video that explains how to make a cool invisible shelf that makes it looks like your books are floating on the wall, like so:

Pretty cool, right? So I decided I desperately needed these shelves, because not only do they look pretty sweet, but it would help me get all the piles of books that I have laying on the ground off the floor. Since the video made it look pretty easy, I figured, what the hey. Now because I did not have any big heavy books that I was willing to sacrifice, I decided to go to Half Price Books (oh how I love thee) to find some in the clearance section or there abouts that looked pretty cool that I would not care about cutting into.

Then I came across these lovely beauties:

Awesome right? Perfect for looking nice on the wall since the spine is really all I care about. Well, if you've never heard of Half Price Books, it's a used bookstore that buys and sells (at half price) used books. It is a real treasure trove and I love going there because 1. it's cheap and 2. it's got books and 3. I always find some pretty cool/unique stuff. I love going there just to see what I can find when I have no particular book I'm looking for, like for this project, for example.

Anyway, as I started looking through these red books to see how much they were ($6) and which ones I wanted (I couldn't buy all of them at $6 each!), I noticed that many of them had an inscription on the inside cover (another thing I love about looking through used books). Then I noticed it was all the same inscription over the period of 3 years and for various holidays:

They are all for "Mom" from "Neal" and sometimes from "Neal and Sally." It dates back from the mom's birthday in 1969 to Valentine's Day of 1971. Out of the 12 books in the collection available at Half Price books, only 4 of them did not have an inscription. Despite the lack of an inscription on 4 of them, I feel it's safe to assume that it was an entire set once owned by "Mom" and given to her from "Neal" (and a few from "Sally"). But, here's where my imagination ran away with me.

As I started thinking more and more about the inscription and why this whole set would be at Half Price Books, it made me kind of sad. I'm guessing Neal was the son (I know pretty crazy guess, huh?), and this woman either loved book collections, Newsweek, art, or art museums. In the hopes to get a great gift that he could spread out in several gifts (I'm sure they were expensive, since I just saw that the set is going for $135 on eBay.), Neal decided to get his mom this set of books to show his mom all of these great places and the art contained inside them since most likely she would not be able to go to these far off exotic art museums.

I'm also guessing that Sally was a sister. My mom thought that perhaps she was Neal's wife or girlfriend, but because Sally only shows up in two inscriptions: that for Christmas 1969 and June 14, 1970, I think I'll stick with my sister assumption. I'm curious, however, about the June 14, 1970 inscription, since it's the only specific date in the set. Is that "Mom's" birthday? An anniversary of marriage? Death? Why is this date so significant? The details are too few that I can't venture a guess on this one.

And finally, why did this entire beautiful collection wind up at the Half Price Books in McKinney, TX. Sadly, I think that "Mom" is no longer with us, and as "Neal" was forced to go through all of the things that once belonged to his mother, he couldn't bare to keep this book collection. Maybe they were too heavy, a waste of space, he felt he'd never have a use for them, or maybe they reminded him too much of his mother and all of the occasions and memories he had of her receiving each book and her reaction as she opened the present. Knowing he and the books might be better off in a new home, he sold them, along with others, I'm sure, to Half Price books.

Where a few have just become my new bookshelves...

What Did I Just Do?

For my 1st project for one of my EMAC classes this semester, we were required to write a text-based piece that was 900-1200 words that had something to do with the ideas or concepts we had read about in this specific book. It could be creative, it could be an essay, it could even be a data visualization or a word cloud, as long as we talked about it etc.

Well, I was nearing the due date (meaning, the night before my class), and I had been thinking about doing something creative. I always feel like sometimes (with certain subjects) it's easier to pull out something creative because I can write it up faster, it's more personal, and it usually gets a better grade because it's "creative." :) When I had first started thinking about the assignment, I decided that I'd probably write a short story kind of a thing because that'd be easy for me to write for one, and I'd get the word count, no problem. After reading the section of the book we were assigned, I had an idea on what I'd do, and I just started writing.

Sounds good, right?

Unfortunately, this one piece will get incorporated into a final portfolio at the end of the semester that includes 3 other projects, and they all have to have an overarching theme/point. Which means, I'll have to continue this story throughout the semester and reframe it through the different projects. Which means...

I just tricked myself into writing another novel/novella.

At least this one I'll be forced to finish, so I can get a good grade (and for my point to come across because this 1st assignment turned into just being more like an intro to the story and for the characters). But the whole time I kept thinking:

What did I just get myself into?

I've made real progress...

As some of you may have heard, the lovely state of Texas was confused by the powers that be for some other state like Michigan or Wisconsin, and us poor Texans didn't know what to do and pretty much shut down the state for four days. School was canceled, my work was canceled, most of the shops and stores either closed or were only open for a few hours, and the grocery store shelves were emptied of all staple foods. The local news was dominated by footage of icy road conditions, and much like police chases, we had continuous coverage of semi trucks jack-knifing on the icy highway along with breaking news of snow and ice falling from Cowboys stadium (you know because the Superbowl is going to be there tomorrow). We had rolling blackouts to conserve the energy and maintain the integrity of the power grid, and most of us holed up inside of our homes, only venturing out for the necessities, which of course led to mean cases of cabin fever. Some went days without seeing another human being.
Everyone had decided this was....

THE SNOWPOCALYPSE!!!!!!

For those in other states where snow and cold weather is the norm, I'm sure this was your reaction to us:

Well, I don't know about you guys that were stuck in the house, but I used my time to work on all those things I wrote about in my last post. I was super proud of myself because I mostly just wanted to sleep and watch TV (which I did plenty of, mind you).  I edited 2 chapters of one of those books, worked on school and church stuff, and made real progress on my dad's stockings (I have now finished more than half the colors that are used!).

I do have some bad news though...

My mom's stocking is never going to be completed (at least not by me).

I had a friend who volunteered to help me get started on my mom's stocking, and even she was telling me I'm never going to have it done in time. It's a counted cross-stitch, and the pattern is a bit complicated, at least for the cross-stitch dabbler. Well, my mom can't go without a stocking, so I searched online for a new kit that was more like my dad's (read easier to do cause I don't have to count anything and just have to fill in the colors that are already painted on the material).

So, this is my mom's new stocking, currently on its way from Utah to Texas:

Hopefully this pattern will be a little easier and I can finish it within the year.

Yes, I've made some real progress all thanks to the SNOWPOCALYPSE!!!!!

2011--The Year of Finishing

And no, I don't mean this year will be all about races, faux painting my walls, or getting new flooring.

This year I've decided that it will be the year that I finish all (or most) of the unfinished things/projects I have in my life. A long time ago I told you about how I always make a list every summer of things I'll try to finish, but I never end up completing anything (or very few). Well, as I started thinking about all the things on those lists and what my new year's resolutions should be, I decided that I should combine them because clearly, I have a problem.

My problem is I get really excited about something, or I decide to try something, and I have to do it right then. But, if it ends up taking too long or I lose interest, I tend to put it away or stop, thinking I'll pick it up later when I have more time. But of course, I never seem to have enough time, other things get in the way, there are more important things to do, I forget about it, etc. I have a pile of books that I've started and haven't finished, arts and craft projects that are half complete, and various other things that I've been meaning to get to but haven't started.

So in an attempt to make myself a better person, and one that finishes what she started, I've decided that I'll make a master list of the things I've been meaning to finish, and I want to get a majority of them completed by the end of the year. Some of them I HAVE to finish, others  I'd like to finish, but I won't be too upset if I don't get to them. After all, I've got a lot of projects on this list (and if you'll notice, a few of the projects will seem familiar, since I've had them on other lists. See, I really am terrible at this).

And because I'm a big believer in making yourself accountable for your goals, I'm sharing these projects I need to finish with you, my blogger friends. Hopefully, you can bug me about getting them done, and as I complete and mark things off my list, I'll let you know. Well, here they are:

HAVE TO FINISH THIS YEAR

• The 3 books I had agreed to edit for a few family friends and my grandfather. Why does this have to be done? Well... I'll be honest, all 3 authors are fairly old, and I want to get their manuscripts back to them before something terrible happens, if you know what I mean.
• The Christmas stockings for my parents that I started in high school. It has been ridiculous how long it has been since I started these and have yet to finish. My parents ask me every year, and they've had the same stockings since they first got married. The waiting has got to end, and I have to finish them. By Christmas.
• Finish writing one of the novels I've started. I have started about 3 novels, with ideas for a few more, and I have yet to actually sit down and finish writing them. Some require some research, which is why I've stopped, but the one I'm hoping to finish (I started it when I was a junior at BYU) is the furthest along and doesn't require any research (at least not yet).

LIKE TO FINISH THIS YEAR

• My BYU graduation album/scrapbook. I have the pictures, so it's not like they are going to go anywhere, I'd just like to finish the scrapbook so I can put all the scrapbook crap away in a box.
• The various books I've yet to finish. Again, I'm pretty good at remembering where I've left off on a book even if it's been awhile, but I'd like to be able to put away this pile of books by my nightstand. (I'm hoping audible.com and librivox.org will help me in this endeavor.) Also, I'm pretty sure my little sister would like me to finish the one I've borrowed from her (An Abundance of Katherines by John Green). She keeps bugging me about where I am in the book, and every time I tell her I'm in the same place since the last time she asked me, she gives me this exacerbated sigh and walks away.
• My New York collage/poster. I had this bright idea to make a collage poster of all the bags and postcards I got while on my trip to New York City last year. I should probably actually do that since they are all sitting in a bag in my room.
• Print out/make a book out of my blog. I like to use my blog as a journal, if you couldn't tell, and a while back when I abandoned my Xanga (yes, I'll admit, I totally had a Xanga that I updated fairly regularly), I made a word document of every Xanga post I had with the plan that I'd print it out and bind it so it'd be my journal for future generations to read and admire (read: mock and criticize). My friend Mary did this with her Xanga posts awhile back and I thought that was a good idea. Again, the word document ain't going no where (I have it saved in like 3 different places), but I'd like to actually print it out and finish it. This one should be fairly easy for me to accomplish this year. Yay!

I could probably come up with a few more if I think about it some more, but I feel like this is a pretty good list that I can actually accomplish this year. Let's hope I can do it. I don't want to go another year with my parent's stockings looking like this: 

Dad's stocking: I realize it's hard to tell, but only the red and green and Santa's skin are done.

My mom's stocking: Haven't even started.

My Personal Aesthetics

Ok, so remember last post how I said I've been working on this school project and I was stressing and worried I might die? Well, I finally finished it (well at least the main part of it; I still have to write the one-page paper that goes with it). It took me 3 days, but it is complete. So, I thought I'd share. :)

The point of the project is to show a visual representation of my personal aesthetics, also incorporating quotes from the philosophers we've studied previously that support our definition of aesthetics. Let's see if you can guess what my definition is by watching the video:



What did y'all think? Believe me, it was hard for me to cut out and down some of these clips. I had many more video clips, like from Mother, Dead Poets' Society, and Bright Star and various other film favorites (when I had the raw footage of everything I wanted to include all together, it was 45 min. long). But, our teacher said it should be about 5 minutes, and this is 6:20 minutes. (I'm hoping she won't notice.)

If you couldn't tell from the video, what I see as beautiful is really anything that invokes or conveys an emotion, whether that's through music, color, landscape, or reality. The main thing is that I value things that portray reality and make me think or contemplate what it is I'm viewing and why I'm feeling the way that I am.

I just hope my teacher realizes that and gives me a good grade. I'm already having difficulties with this class/teacher (another blog post for another, less stressful time), so we'll see what happens.

2009 Wrap-Up: Resolutions Revisited

If you'll recall, in January 2009, I decided to become a better person. With my list of goals that I wanted to accomplish, I made the resolution to learn or do something new every month. While I did succeed in most of my other resolutions (such as reading some new books thanks to my awesome book club), I didn't do too well in others (like finishing my parents stockings I started in middle school, perhaps they're not meant to be finished?). But as most of you might know or have guessed, I did complete the one I was most excited about last January. Let's take a look back:
January: Sew a Skirt
February: Dancing and Flirting
March: Taxes
April: Changing a Tire/Car Maintenance
May and June: Cake Decorating
July: Make a New Dish
August: See a Musical
September and October: Calligraphy and Photography
November: Speed Reading
December: Origami
I am so glad I made this resolution. Not only was it something that I actually completed and kept doing the whole year, but I also learned so many great things I might not have otherwise learned. Through accomplishing this resolution, I discovered several things about myself. I discovered that most things can be accomplished if you have a kit or a great teacher. I discovered a new talent/skill that I really enjoy doing (cake decorating), and I discovered that if I really set my mind to it and have a plan, I really can succeed and accomplish anything.

In my resolutions post last January, I wrote about how I never liked making resolutions because I always gave up a few months into the year. But, now that I have actually been successful in keeping up on a resolution for a whole year, I feel like I can do anything. Ok, maybe not anything, but I now know it's not as hard as you think to be consistent and to keep a resolution all year long.

Having completed my year of doing something new every month, I realized that having a plan and excitement for a resolution really helps to keep it all year. Last year was great, and I achieved many things. I can't wait for what this next year has in store for me. There were several things I had put on my list to learn that I wasn't able to get to (like painting and juggling), which I will try to do this year.

And while last year was really fun and easy, I've decided that this year I need to continue to be better by being more observant of others. Last year, I kind of focused on me learning new things, (and I did have a service-oriented goal too, but it kind of fell by the wayside), but now I need to focus on helping others. It's going to be hard, but I think I can do it. I'm more confident in my abilities now that I was successful last year. I am also trying to be more healthy too, but since I started doing that last year, it won't be listed in my new year's resolutions. Come to think of it, I don't really have a list this year (which might set me up for failure, so I'll work on them).

My one main goal has always been to become a better person, and helping others will definitely help me achieve this goal. Here's to being nicer, kinder, and more helpful to others in 2010! Let's hope I can keep it up. I'll post a list/goals to accomplish this resolution soon because everyone needs a game plan. What's yours?

December--Origami

Awhile back I bought an origami kit. It comes with everything! Even a bone folding and scoring tool! Pretty sweet, I know. The book that came with it, though, just had a few animals in it (and some modular stuff), and it didn't even include the traditional crane! (Something I really felt I needed to know how to do.) So I went out onto the internet, fountain of knowledge, and looked up the directions on how to make a crane (and various other patterns). Let's just say there are pretty much a bajillion different ways to fold paper into a crane. Every site I found had a little step that was different, granted it did end up with the same result.

I didn't necessarily make a 1000, but I made alot of cranes (and a few other things): That's supposed to be a gorilla (it was from the book that came in the kit). (The ones on the right were the only ones I made; the top left my dad did, and the bottom left came with the kit...)

Origami is pretty easy as long as you have really good instructions and diagrams so you know how to fold it. Some are a little more complicated and involve scissors and glue and different pieces (like the gorilla). (I tried making a unicorn and I gave up because I just couldn't understand what the picture and directions were trying to tell me to do!) Origami is fun, and talk about easy, cheap Christmas tree ornaments!

A few pictures to pass the time...

I realize that my last couple posts were intellectual/philosophical, or as my mom said, "boring." So, I realized I needed to put something up before you thought I had gone all existential on you and left the blogosphere to take up handwriting letters. This is not true. I'm currently working on several posts to finally wrap up 2009 (sorry for the delay), but I have not had a chance to finish and put them up. So, in the meantime I figured I'd put up a few pictures of what I've been doing for the past few weeks, cause a picture is worth a 1000 words, right?
The awesome black and white play I went to with some friends.
A birthday cake (Buzz) and a Thank You cake (camera) for our family's photographer and her son. The photographer took these (and others):My brother Caulin's birthday cake (the pic on the cake was another one taken by the photographer).
The next cake looks like a boring old cake, huh?
Until...

That cake I made for a coworker after she showed me this blog (whose cake and pictures are alot better looking than mine).

And those are some of the things I've been up to while I've been away. More blog posts forthcoming.

Thanksgiving Sans Family

This Thanksgiving, for the first time in my life, I had someone else's family's traditional Thanksgiving meal. My family drove to New Mexico to spend Thanksgiving with my grandparents, but my best friend was getting married the day after Thanksgiving (and I was making her cake), so there was no way I could go to NM too. Luckily, I was not without turkey because some family friends invited me to join them for their feast. It was great, and I'm thankful that I did not have to spend Thanksgiving crying at the McDonald's all alone (like another friend was worried I'd be doing). I am also thankful for some great friends that were worried about me and offered me their leftovers so I wouldn't go without.

Here's the reason why I stayed home while my family was out of town: It really took the whole week to make, but because I love Mary a ton, I did it. The leaves are made of fondant and all hand painted. The acorns are made from chocolate and peanut butter chips, and the butterflies are the only things that aren't edible. My Thanksgiving was incredibly busy, with cleaning, getting the cake made, and shopping, I wouldn't even really call it a break. In fact... I think I need another one. Good thing Christmas is coming up really soon.

September and October--Calligraphy and Photography

For those that are wondering, yes, I have been keeping up with my resolution of doing something every month. This post has been a long time coming, but it's finally here. I kind of did both calligraphy and photography in September and October (and even some this month), so I combined them. I will say, both calligraphy and photography are difficult to learn in a month. Here's what I mean:

Calligraphy: I bought a calligraphy kit that included a book and ink and nibs (the tip of the pen that you write with). I read that book, but it was really difficult to figure things out by reading a couple of written instructions and looking at a black and white picture. I tried to follow the directions,but after a while, I just gave up and started to play around: I probably made up my own type of font because I didn't exactly follow one. I combined the ones I liked:I also gave up on using the old school ink/gouache, and I broke down and bought some marker-type calligraphy pens.I could probably get better if I had an actual teacher and practiced some more, but I don't think I like calligraphy enough to invest in that kind of thing. Oh well... as long as it kind of looks nice, people won't be able to tell, right?

Photography: When I first tried to get into photography, I knew I was going to need help. My friend's sister directed me to a rather helpful website, and in my own research I found this site. I also took a little Relief Society Super Saturday class from a professional photographer (I'd have to say, she was probably the most help). Even my brother, Cameron decided to give me some tips!

Even with all this help, again, I think having a teacher (and a nicer camera than my current point and shoot) would help me more. I did the best I could on my own, and it's helped me remember some good tips when I am taking pictures. I would love to get a really nice camera and take a photography class or two (which I might do someday), but at the moment, my time and funds can not help me fulfill this dream. Here's a few "artsy" pictures I tried to do:Yeah, I need help. Well, even though these last two months were not my best this year, I have two more months to go, and I've got high hopes.

The Music Box

Last week for FHE, we were supposed to bring something to have a little silent auction and then bring a story to go with that item. Here's what I brought and my story (the funny events will follow):
"When my great, great grandma Emma was younger, she lived in England in a rather poor but loving family. For her 12th birthday, her family had scrounged together 3 pounds for her to buy whatever she wanted. Her family rarely gave gifts, so this was an incredible sacrifice. Emma was so excited because there had been this jewelry box at the store, and it cost exactly 3 pounds! With the money her family had saved for her birthday, she went the very next day to purchase the box. When she took it home, she discovered it was also a music box! Even though the box is not worth much, Emma cherished it. She listened to it every night before she fell asleep, and although she didn't have much jewelry to put in it, she loved the box.
Eventually, once she was married and had a daughter of her own, she moved to America. Emma played the music box for her daughter Blanche when she was a baby as a lullaby. Blanche also came to love her mother's music box as well. When the time came, Emma gave Blanche the music box to illustrate the importance of willing to sacrifice for others and to show her daughter love. Blanche, after Emma died, held on to her mother's music box to remember her mother by. Blanche passed it down to her daughter Verla, and it has continued through the generations.
Although this is a family keepsake, I think Emma would understand if I sacrificed this music box to help someone else, just as her family sacrificed to let her buy the music box.

Now before you start fretting about how I just gave away a family heirloom, this story is entirely false. (I made it up in like 5 minutes before the activity.) I think the only truth to it is that I have a great aunt named Verla. I originally thought that the silent auction was with real money for charity, hence the last part about sacrificing to help someone else. What it was is that we each got 10 poker chips that we could use to "bid" on what other people had brought and to take it home. Items ranged from a used band-aid to a guitar (that's right... someone brought a GUITAR to just GIVE away...). I made sure we could make up the story, and since it was ok, I had fun with it (since the fun part for me was making up the story not auctioning for items). The funny thing was that several thought my story was real and were really worried that I was giving away such a priceless family treasure. I assured them that it was not such a treasured item, nor a sacrifice for me.

The real story is that last Christmas (I think, could have been the one before that), my aunt gave me some jewelry, and she put it in this box. In fact, my sister has the same type of box only her's is green and oval shaped. I'm sure my Aunt got it at some department store or something. I think that the box is very nice (don't ask me what song it plays though cause I can't remember), but it has been sitting in my closet since that Christmas I got it.

There was a guy there who wanted the box desperately; he even wanted to pay me actual money to take it out of the auction because he wanted it that bad (I'm pretty sure he was getting it for his girlfriend). I probably should have taken real money over poker chips, but I figured he'd probably get it in the end so why make him pay real money for something I'm just giving away anyway. This guy was hilarious; he ended up paying real money to someone else to get their poker chips, and you know what he bid? The infinite symbol. Yeah... he won. Hopefully his girlfriend will appreciate it as much as my great, great grandma Emma did... or would have had she been real.

July--Make a New Dish

First off, I apologize because I didn't take a picture of any of the delicious foods I made. I did, however, find a few pics of the same foods online, so I'll post those. Originally this month, I was going to do a little photography. But, I didn't really have time to improve/practice anything. Then, I realized that I had made alot of new foods and tried alot of new recipes for a little get together I had at the end of the month. So, then I realized July could be making a new food instead of photography (don't worry photography will come later on).

For my book club meeting, I made lots of food (probably more than necessary) that I had never made before. I was going to post recipes of them, but I realized that will take up alot of space, so if you want recipes for any of the things I list, let me know and I'll send them to you.

Here's the delicious feast I had, at least the ones I made, (those that ate it, feel free to comment on whether or not you actually thought it was delicious or not):
Mango Chipotle Salmon Dip (on the back of the Salmon Creations package)
Salmon Croquettes
Cucumber Sandwiches
Toasted Ravioli
and Oreo Truffles (Pic later in post)

I also made some other things for my family:
Tuna Croquettes
Crunchy Chicken Chunks
Parmesan Crusted Chicken

And even though it was a recent recipe I did that wasn't in July, I also made spaghetti squash with sun-dried tomato alfredo sauce and sauteed mushrooms, yellow squash, and zuchini. (It was delicious, but I really needed to put some meat in there though.) I think everything I made was delicious, although I think the fried (toasted) raviolis got a little over cooked/burned, so the ones I ate weren't the best.

My favorite thing I made was the oreo truffles. Those were amazing and so easy too! I had gone to a family friend's eagle court of honor, and they had made these truffles. My little sister at a bajillion; in fact, I think what she said was something like she could now die happy and she wanted a lifetime supply of them. I obviously had to ask the lady for the recipe so that I could at least partially fulfill my little sister's wish of having a lifetime supply. My brother later told me a girl in his Home Ec class made these and called them snowballs. I will leave you with this recipe:

1 pkg. of Oreo cookies, finely crushed (I would use a food processor or blender to get it really fine)
1 pkg (8 oz) of cream cheese, softened
2 pkgs. (8 sq. each) Baker's Semi-sweet chocolate, melted (or you can use candy melts chocolate)

Mix the crushed oreo crumbs with the cream cheese until well-blended. Then shape into 1-in. balls (about 42).

Dip the balls in the melted chocolate and place on the waxed paper. Garnish with sprinkles, oreo cookie crumbs or drizzle melted white chocolate (that's what I did). Refrigerate until hard.

Enjoy!