With Agent Mattie's new and improved profile, she knew that soon the males of the species would be sending her messages and wanting to communicate right and left. She knew her tweaks would have gotten someone's attention, and she was hoping that it would be what she needed to really carry on with her experiment. But, alas... perhaps she had been wrong in her theory:
By the time I had my 2nd profile, I had received at least 25 to 30 matches, and most of them seemed like they had potential. However, I'll admit, I was afraid to send them a message because I didn't want to seem forward. Hey, I'm new to this online dating thing, I don't know what the protocol is! So instead, I went about my daily life and occasionally seeing who else eHarmony and sent me.
Then I got excited because it said I had some communications!
Yeah... closed communications messages.
For those that aren't aware, if you come across a match in which after reading their profile you can already tell it's not going to work out, you can "Close Communication" with them. Basically, they get taken off of your "matches" list, and they cannot message or contact you. When you decide to close communication, eHarmony gives you a list of explanations as to why you didn't think they'd work out. You can't write your own, you have to pick the given ones. While some are pretty understandable excuses: "The distance is far too great." or "Based on statements in their profile, I'm not interested." etc., some are kind of random, odd, and when I received some of them, a bit mean.
I received lots of "Other" messages. Ummm I guess that's ok. I gave out some of these too because I didn't want to be mean by saying they were not interesting people. Some of the matches I received seemed like great guys, just not for me. So, I wasn't too upset by receiving "Other" as an excuse. I was, however, upset when I received these:
"I have too much happening in my life at the moment" and "I am taking a break from dating" both seem ridiculous. Why did you even sign up for eHarmony then?
"I am pursuing another relationship." Ok, I kind of understand this one, but come on! Just close your profile then, why keep looking at greener pastures, when you seem perfectly happy in the one you're in.
"I want to pursue other matches on eHarmony." I think this one probably hurt the worst out of all of them. I mean, I realize that there are better options out there besides me, but I just don't like how it's phrased. I don't know, maybe I'm just being too sensitive.
This last one I think was the most confusing to me: "I think the difference in our values is too great." Ummm... what? I know I put down that eHarmony should only match me with other LDS people, and this guy, from his profile seemed really nice and everything. If he is in fact LDS like he said he was, I'm not sure what the difference in our values is because I thought we had the same values. It was odd.
Anyway, the majority of the reasons I got were "Other" and "I want to pursue other matches on eHarmony." Well FINE, Abe from Provo! I didn't want to talk to you anyway! Yeah, you too, Ben from California! I'll just see what these other matches have that you don't. Meanie.
LOL, I'm okay, I promise. I was a tiny hurt at first (I mean, who loves getting rejected?), but I understand that I'm not exactly what some guys are looking for. I was expecting it to happen and work out that way, which is why I went into this as an experiement. It was a learning experience, and I would see who was out there and if I could get a few laughs.
Once the tinge of sadness left, I too started closing communications with people. It actually felt good. Why do I have to sit and wait for them to reject me first? If I know I'm not going to like them, why keep them in my matches? My only question was, would I get anything else besides a "Closed Communcation Message"?
1 comment:
Rejection sucks. I try to avoid it. :)
Post a Comment