Two posts two days in a ROW!! I'd just like to preface this with saying, don't expect me to be posting everyday now. Today was just too weird of a day and I had too great of a story to not tell you what happened. After this I'll go into hiding again till the end of the semester. Promise.
This morning, on my way to work, I hit a squirrel.
I tried to slow down, but it was just going too fast and then I distinctly heard a thud. (Gosh, if I'm in my car, animals should just stay away. Things never work out well for them.)
I felt a tinge of sadness and guilt for hitting it, but it's not like it was enough for me to do anything. I continued on to work and carried on with my day and forgot about the squirrel for the most part.
Should have known that squirrel was a sign of how the day would go.
At lunch, I purposefully avoided looking at some lady? (I don't know I wasn't looking at her/him remember?) who was begging for money, holding out her hat to cars that were at the stop light. I don't carry cash, so it's not like I had any to give anyway.
Another sign?
By the end of the day, I had forgotten all about both, and I was tired and ready to go home. I even thought to myself... perhaps I'll take a power nap before I have to go to a rehearsal (because I agreed to help a classmate with her final project; I clearly have a problem with telling people no).
FYI, that power nap never happened. Here's what did:
As I was leaving work, I turned right out of the parking lot and went about 20 feet before I was waved down by an older (probably in his 40s) African American man, wearing, oddly enough, a "Master Thug" shirt (as in Mastercard... get it?) (But I'll be honest, I didn't notice the shirt till later on, it just seemed interesting compared to what happened next. Also, I only added that he was black so you could get an accurate description. I really didn't care that he was black.) Next to him was what I assumed was his son, who looked like he was 17 or so. I pulled over and rolled down my window to see what was up.
He asked if I had a jack that they could borrow because they had a flat tire. Seemed like an innocent enough request to me and we were literally RIGHT in front of my work building, so I parked and pulled out the jack for him.
But then he told me they didn't have a spare tire to replace it with, which made me wonder why they needed a jack then if they didn't have something. The guy told me that he was just in the building to talk to a lawyer on the 12th floor, and he pulled out his paperwork to prove it to me (it looked legit... legit... like I even know? Ugh whatever.) He said he was trying to get a divorce, which is why he was there meeting with the lawyer. He told me he didn't have any money, and all he had was $2 (so he couldn't buy a tire either), which he gladly offered me several times (I didn't take it).
After making excuses myself (I had to get to class, I didn't have any cash) and having them not work, I said I could drive him to the tire place, which was down the street (about 3 minutes away) and drop him off. So, he left his son to watch the car (which was now on my jack) and he came with me to the tire place.
Now before you start lecturing me about how this was a terrible idea, I get it okay. There were tons of things I should have done differently or not done... I understand. But this is what happened. And I'd like to think that if it hadn't been what I should be doing, I would have gotten a sinking feeling about him or the situation. But I didn't. So I carried on... as you should do now with my story:
On the way to the tire place he tells me his nickname is Mike but his given name is Columbus "like the explorer Christopher" (got it) and that he's not from around there so he doesn't really know where he is because he's from the Garland/Dallas/635 area. I tell him my name is Mattie, but that's it. He then proceeds to tell me that he's trying to get a divorce from his wife who he hasn't seen in awhile because she ran off with another woman (WHAT? Did I hear that right?). And he's trying to get the divorce done so that he can marry the boy's (the 17 year old that was with him) mother. He also tells me how much he has to pay for rent etc. and how much he had to pay for the lawyer (you know clearly illustrating to me that he has no money to buy this tire).
So the first trip to the tire place (that's right I said first as in there were multiple trips), we go and borrow a lug nut wrench from the tire people because mine wouldn't fit on their car (and luckily the tire dude was SUPER nice in letting us just take it.) And then I decide I'll be super nice and drive him back. He asks the tire dude how much a used tire will be ($35), and he looks at me wondering what I'll say.
I don't know what happened. I guess I thought... $35 isn't too much; this guy looks pretty sad and he just wants to get a divorce from his gay soon to be ex wife so he can marry this other chick and be a dad to this kid. I don't know. I don't know okay.
And so I told him it was fine and I'd buy it for him. He practically jumped for joy and said he had to serve me and stopped me from opening my own car door so he could hold it open for me. We drove back to his car, and I waited for him to take the tire off, and we then drove BACK to the tire place. I bought him a new tire and then drove back to his car so he could put it on.
The little trips were probably the most interesting because he told me about how he always had a feeling his soon to be ex was gay but he could never prove it. I asked how he found out (hey he was already sharing and I was kind of curious... hello I was thinking of you guys. I wanted a good story. Ugh... me and my writer inclinations dang it.). He told me he was in prison (Ummm what? Yeah I didn't ask him this time and he didn't share the reason.) and she had written him a letter telling him, and when he got out and came home he found her and realized it was all true.
He asked me how that could be. How could another woman just run off with another woman? He couldn't understand it and didn't know why people did that because God doesn't like that. God wouldn't make them that way on purpose would he? That's not what it says in the Bible... etc. (He went on but I really didn't say much or comment on anything he was saying... I just kind of said "I don't know" a lot and nodded and said "I understand." I'm also not commenting to you about this either because of other reasons, so just know these words were from him and I remained neutral and rather silent while he rambled.) He also told me about how he was taught to respect women and how a relationship is about doing things for each other and listening to each other. He said he knows how to treat his woman right, even in bed (Umm ok... TMI. Luckily this was the last trip back to the car and we were super close to it.) and then quickly added he didn't mean "no disrespect... but it's true." (Thank you for that.) He said he'd come visit me, I told him that was okay (I wasn't going to give him any kind of address because even though I had spent $35 and he could have theoretically paid me back, I didn't care enough to want to see this person ever again.)
I waited in the car for a bit while he changed out the tire and while his "son" was finishing up he came over to me.
Now this is what kind of made me wonder if I should have done what I did and helped him because the man had the audacity to ask me this.
He asked if he could have $5. I got kind of angry at this and thought he was pretty rude for asking considering everything I've done for him at this point. I told him again I didn't have any cash, and I couldn't give him any money. He said he wanted to buy cigarettes and I could use my card. (EXCUSE ME?) Not going to lie, I got pissed. I told him, "I am not buying you cigarettes. I just bought you a $35 tire, and I don't even know you." He could tell I was pissed at him for even asking and he quickly and profusely tried to apologize and say that I already did so much and it was fine and he was just asking and it's okay.
He finished putting the tire on, gave me my jack back, and then I left (with the hope and his promise that he'd take the wrench from the tire place back. I sure hope he did.).
So here's my question to you... in a world where everyone is distrusting of everyone else, where there are so few occasions where others do good deeds because we feel like they are just scamming us, or where we judge someone based on what they look like or how they are dressed, was I being too trusting? Should I have just said "Sorry sucks to be you; I have to go, give me my jack back"? Should I have just ignored his waving and kept driving because he didn't look how a "trustworthy" person looks? Was I being a good samaritan or was I a sucker and being played for a fool by the "Master thug"?
I'd like to think that I was doing the right Christ-like thing and because of that the Lord was watching out for me and made sure nothing bad went down, but honestly I don't know the answer myself.
But what I do know is that it was all because of that damn squirrel.
5 comments:
Hey, Mattie!
I kind of have a few funny stories along these lines, too. The thing I tell myself is that I can't control other people. If their motives are impure, or they're just trying to hustle me, I'll never know and can't really change anything even if I did. BUT I can control how I react, and how quick I am to offer assistance. I also try really hard to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I always assume people really ARE in need, and honestly I'll bet that's usually how it is. That's my personal take on the matter, but obviously it comes down to how you feel about it. Good luck sorting things out, Mattie! :)
Thanks Bethany! I always try to see the best in people too and trust them unless proven otherwise. But sometimes I worry it gets me into trouble.
I would have done the same thing and then been totally pissed at myself by the end for being a sucker when he asked for more money and told you to use your card. Maybe you were really saving not him but the 17 yr old from being stuck with him on the side of the road for hours if not days. Maybe that will help you get your warm and fuzzy feelings back.
Please come drive by my house! I have a squirrel that I had to evict from my attict (multiple times) that has now decided to chew up my porch swing. I would happily pay for any body work your card needed after running over him...
Erica, yeah... I mean after thinking about it a while now, it's not like they would have been stuck there. Both of them had cell phones... But, I'm trying not to think about it cause it'll just upset me, so I won't.
Erika, haha... I don't need any more guilt for killing defenseless animals!
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